Our Adoption StoryRonnie & Peter

Jumping In

Long before we actually started the adoption process, we dreamed of being dads and knew that we wanted to grow our family through adoption. We started having serious conversations about it in early 2023 and then started our research. Angel was the first place we found and spoke with. We instantly knew it was the right place for us.

Within days of our adoptive family profile being completed, we were chosen by an expectant mother. She was early in her pregnancy and we knew that if this worked, we were in it for the long haul. We started communicating with her, but for the duration of our relationship, it unfortunately never felt easy or natural. We lived in fear that she would choose to parent and it never felt like we were building a friendship. When we tried to hire attorney services for her, she never ended up meeting with them. She also started to become more demanding of financial support as we got closer to her due date. We had a gender reveal together and found out it was a boy, and we even planned a baby shower with her, so we wanted to continue to stick with her. However, after her demands got too great, we ultimately decided it wasn’t the healthiest connection for us and we chose to walk away.

Walking away from that first birthmother was an incredibly emotional decision, and not one that we took lightly. We spoke with Angel, our attorneys, our families, and each other at length before making our decision. Even so, we were crushed when it was all said and done. We had wanted that little boy so badly. We had fallen in love with the idea of our family and that loss was something we weren’t sure we could recover from. We had to really reflect on the last four months and decide if we wanted to even continue with adoption.

Trusting the Process

After our disrupted opportunity, we waited about one month before being chosen again. When Angel reached out to us, they said that if this opportunity worked it would be much shorter than the last because this expectant mother was due in less than four weeks!

We were hesitant to speak with this expectant mother, but we kept an open mind and heart. After just one conversation, we knew this was it. The conversation felt so different this time. She immediately felt like a friend we had known for ages! She shared with us ultrasound photos, details of her pregnancy, and continued to refer to her baby as "your baby” or “our baby."

As we got within one week of the expectant mother’s due date, her doctor recommended that she be induced the following week. We had our bags packed, our travel plan was in place, and we were ready to leave. As it turns out, we didn’t have to wait until the following week, because in the early hours of Saturday morning she let us know that she was in labor and it was time for us to head her way!

We picked up our rental car, packed our bags, and were on the road within the hour. We knew we had an 18-hour drive ahead of us and wanted to get moving. Only hours into our drive, the expectant mother texted us that our son had been born and we were so disappointed to miss it. We started to get really scared that by us missing those first moments and the first day, she was going to change her mind about her adoption plan. She continued to refer to him as “our son,” but it only curbed our anxiety a little bit.

No Judgment Here

Knowing that our son and his birthmother were still in the hospital being well cared for, we chose to stop at the halfway point of our drive to catch up on sleep. After just a couple hours of sleep, we received a call from a state social worker confirming our adoption plan and asking if we were on our way. The expectant mother had disclosed to us some medical details during our drive that we were unaware of previously, so this call wasn’t a surprise, but we still felt pressure to get moving again.

While the medical news came as a surprise to us, we had already decided we would continue forward with the adoption. Our son’s birthmother was giving us the most wonderful gift and it wasn’t our place to judge her, only to support her and support our son.

The Best Gift

When we finally arrived at the hospital, we met our son’s birthmother and her mother first. They were both so warm and welcoming towards us. Then it was finally time to meet our son, Jackson, for the first time. We were blown away with how perfect he was! We got to spend our time together in the NICU and Jackson’s birthmother shared her time with us and Jackson.

After everyone was discharged from the hospital, we treated Jackson’s birthmother to dinner and spent that evening together. It was amazing to see all of the people that immediately loved Jackson sitting at a table together.

We ended up staying in Jackson’s birth state for ten full days, but we were lucky enough to be in an area where we have friends, so they invited us to stay with them! Between the wonderful hospital staff, Jackson’s amazing birthmother, and our friends, our faith in the process was completely restored. We are so grateful for everyone that surrounded us during our adoption journey and know that without their support, we wouldn’t be the dads we are today to Jackson.